The Hard and the Oh So Worth it Moments

Everyday poses challenges for me. Here are some of the biggest challenges I've come across thus far.

Bedtime! Oh my gosh! It's awful! It's hard!!! You see, nighttimes are the only time that T and I get to spend an ounce of time together. And well, we are really craving time together right now. So, we try to put the babies down together. I hold and feed one, T holds and feeds the other. Well, either Nur or TT always protests. And one of their protesting, means the other one is up. Obviously, we should put them together separately, but we miss each other! And right now, Nur is definitely the better sleeper. TT passed out around 8 last night, but then was up at 9, needing to be fed again, held, and soothed back to sleep. No biggie, except she didn't get back to sleep until 11:30. This mama is tired!

Feedings. Nur and TT are on very different feeding schedules, mostly due to the fact that Nur eats baby food while TT is just on formula. When I feed Nur, TT sits with me and just watches and plays. But when it's TT's turn to get fed, Nur freaks out! Even though he just ate and has a full tummy. He just can't comprehend that someone is getting food and he's not. I get his frustration. I mean, I'm sure babies weren't fed in front of other babies at the orphanage. I'm guessing they were all fed at the same time. But here's the thing. I can't leave Nur in a room without me, so he needs to sit by me while I feed Nur.

Holding and giving TT attention. This is really hard right now. Nur is at an age where he seems to feel jealousy. When TT gets held or gets attention, Nur freaks out a bit. He will wimper and hold his arms out to me. I try to oblige, but well, she's not even 4 months old yet, and she also has high needs right now. And when they both cry at the same time, I try to soothe them both, but I always feel like I'm making a choice.

Anxiety Issues. Nur still has a lot of anxieties. A lot are surrounding feedings. Others are that I always must be near, and touching him. We are still working on trust and will be for a while.

But the OH SO WORTH IT MOMENTS far outway the hard moments. Nur and TT are really starting to interract. It's wonderful. Nur is making SO many improvements daily! When he first got home, he wouldn't bear any wait on his legs. None! Now he will stand up with support. He's getting so strong! Also, I've been trying to teach him how to clap, and today he clapped. I was one proud mama! :)

And here is a glimpse into our lunch time. I put TT in her bumbo and set it on the table and she plays with her FAVORITE toy Sophie. (Thanks M and A for that gift! Brilliant) She sits there and smiles, laughs and plays, while I sing silly songs. And here is Nur eating. Today's menus was turkey and gravy. Yum Yum!