Potty Stuff

I haven't talked about all things "potty" in a while, so I thought it was time for a little update.

One of the many things I've noticed as a parent, is that we like to take credit for things our kids excel at, but we also like to blame ourselves if something doesn't go right with our children.  Having two children, so close in age, who for the most part, I parent the exact same way, has made me realize that every child is wired differently and if something does or does not click with them immediately, it's not all about me.  At all. 

Let's talk about TT and the potty.  The girl turned 2, and she was ready.  She was exhibiting all the signs of being ready, so we decided to give it a go.  I had a candy jar for rewards, a sticker chart, potty books, and you name it, and within a week, the girl was in big girl underpants that she got to pick out, and was rarely having an accident.  We attempted to do pullups before underpants, but to TT, there was no difference, and she refused to wear pullups.  We started going out of the house and praying she wouldn't have an accident.  We keep a potty chair in our van, and people laugh at us, but man, that thing has saved us on more than one occassion.

We have continued to diaper her at night, and I have felt no rush to get her out of nighttime diapers.  Only, she takes them off.  She hates the feeling of a diaper on.  (Can't blame her)  But I was doing a lot of laundry for a while cause she was wetting her bed almost nightly. 

Then a couple of weeks ago, the entire family was on a shopping expedition, when TT saw a pillow pet that she HAD to have.  I had her ask her father, and well, she is wrappedaround is finger, so of course he said yes.  Both T and I gave her a big talk about how she couldn't take her diaper off and wet her bed because it would ruin the pillow pet.  (We know this from experience from the two she had previously ruined due to saturation of urine) We told her that she had to sleep in a diaper, and no more wetting her bed.  Well, she took this to a whole different level, and decided that she would just stay dry at night.  And if she had to go potty, she would yell for me (never her baba, figures) and that I would take her to the bathroom.  We have now gone an entire week without diapering her at all.  And not one accident.  I would say my almost 3 year old (2 months from today! Wow!) is fully potty trained.  I'm so proud!!!

And then there is Nur.  We tried to potty train him the exact same time that we did TT.  To us, it just made sense to attempt this all at once.  After about 2 weeks, the nanny and I decided that he just wasn't ready.  We didn't want to hurt his self-esteem, and he clearly wasn't getting it, and that was okay.  Again, we started to train him at the same time as TT, even though he wasn't showing the signs of readiness.  The boy still likes to poop in his sleep.  (Telltale sign that he's not ready) The thought of being in a diaper where he's sitting in his pee doesn't bother him.  He's never tried to take his diaper off by himself, and he never comes up to me to tell me that he's pooped.  We have revisited the potty chair a few times since last summer, and once in a while, he will go potty in the chair.  But when I ask him if he went potty, he'll say no, but when I look, I see that he did, which makes me think it was just a coincidence. 

I'm not concerned at all that my 3 and a half year old isn't potty trained.  He'll get it, I have no doubt about that.  Something will switch in him eventually, and I'll continue to revisit it, and probably even go hardcore this fall.  But until then, there is no shame in wearing diapers.  Boys tend to take longer, especially when they are verbally delayed.  (Although I would argue Nur is now caught up in that regard)

All kids are different, and I'm grateful for the experience of parenting both Nur and TT because that is evident in everything they say and do.  There are so many things that Nur excels at that TT still struggles with.  I'm doing the best I can as their mother, and I know sometimes things will click with them, and sometimes things will happen more quickly.  Either way, I know it's not my fault, and I know it wasn't my brilliance that got TT trained so quickly. 

I enjoy knowing that it's not all about me. :)