Weekly Pregnancy Post - 23 Weeks

How far along: 23 weeks

Gender: Girl!

Pregnancy Symptoms: Something moving in my tummy. A bigger body. Weighing more than I've ever weighed my entire life.

Maternity Clothes: Definitely. And I even found some pretty cute ones. I can't wait for spring though as my options will become more plentiful.

Movement: More and more movement this week.

Best Moment of the Week: Definitely the kicks that are becoming more frequent. It makes it all so real! I'm starting to actually believe that I'm pregnant and that this isn't some sick joke.

Food Cravings: Spicy Chicken Basil Noodles. (My favorite Thai Dish) Reeses Peanut Butter Cups.

What I miss: A glass of wine. Being able to put things in my mouth such as food and medications and not have to read labels to see if there is a pregnant woman warning on it.

What I'm looking forward to: My monthly OB appointment on Thursday. I love my appointments! I love leaving knowing that at that exact minute, everything appears to be okay. The reassurance it gives me is priceless.

Weekly Wisdom: It's really okay for me to be excited about my pregnancy. I can be excited for myself and at the same time, sad for those women who are struggling with trying to get pregnant themselves. The same way I was able to be excited for my friends who got pregnant, while being sad for myself at the same time. Both emotions are okay. I no longer need to carry the guilt of being pregnant around with me. But I will never stop hoping and praying for all of those beautiful women out there struggling with this. I want you to know if you're reading this, that I think and pray for you all daily, and will continue to do so.

Total Randomness

1. Does anyone ever watch Real Housewives? (Whether it be of Orange County, NYC, or whatever?) This show is sadly one of my guilty pleasures in life. I don't know what exactly draws me to it, but I've been watching it on a pretty regular basis lately. Well, for the most part, these women disgust me. I watch this show and see these women as a great example of how females should NOT behave.

2. Sometimes I fear I underestimate how much work two little ones so close in age will be. I've been reading some blogs lately from people in somewhat similar situations as I'm in, and they are always talking about HOW hard it is, how they never sleep, how they live their life in complete exhaustion. I'm a bit scared, but I know there is nothing that can properly prepare me for it. I'm not going to understand just how much work it is until it happens.

3. Do you have any people in your life that just don't go with you. . . at all? You find that your relationship is more combative than anything? I have a couple people like that in my life, and it's time to just cut them loose. Why do we keep people in our lives that don't add value and happiness? For me, it was always because I wanted to avoid confrontation. But my priorities in life are shifting heavily, and I think it's time to only have people in my life that bring value.

4. Lately, I feel like my life is straight out of the movie Groundhog's Day. Monday morning, the alarm goes off at 6am, I get up and ready for work. I work for 8 hours. I come home, and do it all for the next 5 days. Then the 2 day weekend comes. Always enjoyable, and then the pattern repeats itself at Monday at 6am. Sometimes I can't believe this is my life. I hope I find a way to break this pattern.

5. When is the right time to solidify daycare? It hasn't been on my radar much after the last home daycare place I called said it was way to early to reserve a spot. So, when should I reserve two infant spots in a daycare? Should I be worried that I haven't done that yet?

6. T and I have been planning the garage sale we plan to hold in early summer. We are really looking forward to it, and it will be our last fundraising effort in terms of the adoption. We are hoping we'll already have a referral by that point, and that the money can help with airfare costs and hotel fees for while we are in Ethiopia.

7. Sometimes I read other blogs, and wonder if I'm doing enough to prepare. Should I be doing more? Should I have more done at this point? Most of the time, I'm at a loss of what to do next.

8. When are most baby showers held? Just wondering the appropriate time for showers, as some people have asked me.

9. Spring is almost here in MN! Guess what I saw in my front yard this weekend? Grass!!! For the very first time in a LONG time. It's wonderful. :-D Although, this is MN, so that means tomorrow we could get a foot of snow. But, I'm really hoping that we are done with snow for the winter. Bring on the spring!!!

10. My face.book days are numbered. The majority of the people I am friends with, I am SO happy I have connected with. You know, the former high school classmates and people like those. I'm hesitant to quit face.book because it really is my means of staying in touch with people who don't live in my area. But sometimes I feel like it has allowed me to just passively watch other people's lives without making an effort to really find out what's going on with them. And I know people do that to me too. They read my updates and that's them keeping in touch instead of them picking up the phone or email. I don't know. . . I just think my time is almost near to quit. It's the people that I really want to keep in touch with that are keeping me on it.

11. Does anyone know where the blogger Yaya went? I loved reading her blog, she had just gotten a referral, and bam! Her blog seems to be gone. Just wondering if anyone knows what happened?

These are just some of the random thoughts going through my head on this Monday morning. I have some more posts coming up later this week that I hope will be interesting.

Also, have you ever read my blog and thought to yourself. . . "I wish Leah would blog blog about this or that?" Well, feel free to leave a comment here, as I'm always up for post suggestions.

Oh, and T started his guest post this weekend. According to him, he finished 4 sentences. Hey, it's a start! ;-)

And because I think posts with pictures are so exciting, I randomly went into my picture file on my work computer, and randomly grabbed a couple of photos without looking, and these are the two pictures of the day. I have so many pictures on my work computer, so I thought I'd randomly show some on this blog, and it's fun to be completely surprised at what pictures I will find, as I haven't looked at these photos in ages.

Happy Monday Everyone!


Lisbon, Portugal, our honeymoon.

Taher hanging out on the beaches in Alexandria, Egypt on the beautiful Mediterrean.

Bringing Happiness to Others

Being sick this week, allowed me to be home a couple days, which allowed me to watch Oprah. One of the days I was home, Roger Epert was on the show. For those of you who don't know who this is, Roger Epert is a film critic, and after a recent battle with cancer, he lost part of his jaw and his ability to speak. It was a very uplifting episode, and a quote from his journey really hit home for me..

"I believe if at the end of it all, according to our abilities, we have done something to make others a little happier and something to make ourselves a little happier, that is about the best we can do. To make others less happy is a crime. To make ourselves unhappy is where all crime starts. We must try to contribute joy to the world. That is true, no matter what our problems, our health, our circumstances, we must try. I didn't always know this, and I am happy that I lived long enough to find it out."

This really hit home for me. This passage is so simple. It's so easy to do. Yet how many of us focus our lives in making other's happy? I try from time to time, but not hard enough. And lately, I have seen the happiness that others have brought into my life, and I realize I'm not doing a good enough job at spreading the happiness.

It's hard to name all of the wonderful things people have done for me recently to spread happiness, but I'm going to try.

M made me a beautiful vase to auction off on my blog. I've never met this amazing woman in real life, yet she took time out out her family life to do this wonderful and thoughtful thing for me..........F, another woman I've never met, made a wonderful gift for me to auction...........People I've met and never met donated money to make the adoption costs a little bit easier..........D donated beautiful things for me to sell at a garage sale this summer..........K donated a crib and changing table to me and Taher..........A sends me handwritten notes with CD's she makes. She also donated money to our fund, and she always let's me know she's thinking of me..........My parents and T's parents have given us baby furniture and clothes, things that help with the expenses of preparing for two little ones.

There are so many more things that I'm not thinking of, but my point is, so many people have brought happiness into my life, and not because they expected anything in return.

This has motivated me to want to spread happiness also. I'm working on a project, where every week, I will focus on one person in my life, and do something for them. I will also focus on never being the reason for someone's unhappiness.

I too, want to live a life of purpose. And just like Roger Ebert said, I am so thankful that I lived long enough to learn this lesson.

Surviving the Wait

All of us are waiting for something in our lives. Whether it be waiting for the clock to strike 5pm so we can go home from work, whether it's waiting for the big party Friday evening, or waiting to get married this summer, or waiting for that family reunion. . . We are all waiting for something.

For me, it's my children.

Somedays, the waiting is harder than others. Somedays I walk by the two empty bedrooms in my house, and peak in the closets at the boy's and girl's clothes hanging so nicely in the closet, just waiting to be worn. Sometimes I hold my adorable little niece, and the desire for my children becomes so strong. I can't wait to know what it feels like to be Mama. Sometimes I hear about a great exhibit at the children's museum, and dream of the day Taher and I can take our lil monkies there. Or take them to the art fair, or the zoo.

Somedays, the waiting is definitely harder than other days.

Somedays, I find the waiting easier than other days.

Some days, Taher and I get home from work, and decide to have a lazy evening. We get into our "comfies," order takeout, and decide what movie to watch on the tele. We then cuddle on the couch until we fall asleep. Somedays I wonder if Taher and I have taken our last big vacation in a while. I fondly remember our amazing vacations, and how easy it was to live our life as jet-setters. On these days, the waiting is easier.

The past couple of days, I've been sick, and I found myself wondering how I will take care of kids when I don't have the energy to take care of myself?

Somedays I come to the realization that Taher and I's day as a married couple with no kids is nearly over. We can't continue spending our money on ourselves only. We won't be able to continue being selfish in how we live our lives. We can't just come home from work and decide that we will do nothing productive that evening. We won't be able to order Indian takeout whenever we feel like it, because I suppose we'll have to feed the kids too. (And I don't know if spicy foods is good for little baby bellies)

Sometimes the realization that life is changing hits me hard. I'm happy it's changing. I'm ready to be a Mom, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared. I AM scared. I'm scared that T and I will hardly ever get one on one time together. I'm scared I won't be able to see my friends as much as I would like. I'm scared I won't get to experience my international travels which I'm so passionate about. I'm scared that I will be so tired that I'll be walking around in a cloud constantly.

On days where the fear sets in, the waiting becomes much much easier for me. And instead of praying that time speeds up a bit so I can have my children here with me, I pray that time slows down a little, so I can enjoy every last second as a family of two.

Weekly Pregnancy Post - 22 Weeks

How far along: 22 weeks
Gender: Girl!
Pregnancy Symptoms: Something moving in my tummy.
Maternity Clothes: Definitely. And I even found some pretty cute ones.
Movement: More and more movement this week.
Best Moment of the Week: Daily movements. Before, the movements were off and on, but now, I can feel them pretty much everyday. It's always such a happy and reassuring feeling. Another wonderful thing is that our baby responds so much to T's voice. When he talks to my belly, she always seems to kick. It's great. :-D
Food Cravings: Chocolate!
What I miss: Being able to medicate myself when I'm sick.
Weekly Wisdom: Being sick is no fun. I feel like I already know what it's like to be a Mom and constantly worrying about my child. I've had a bad cold/sinus infection, and I've been so worried that the coughing, sneezing, and just feeling horribly hasn't affected the baby in any way.

Unfortunately no baby picture this week. I lived in my pajamas for the past two days and didn't get around to taking a picture. There hasn't been much change since last week though. :-D

Projects

I want to apologize for how bad of a blog reader and commenter I've been lately. I'm suffering from an awful sinus infection, and have been in the horizontal position for days. I finally broke down and went to the doctor to get antibiotics. I hate medicating myself at all, but I couldn't handle the pain anymore. Hopefully I'm on the mend.

Also, thanks for those who commented that you like the new look of my blog. Kelsey did the makeover, and if anyone is looking for a makeover, I would definitely recommend Kelsey. She was awesome, and SO quick! I emailed her, and she got to work immediately. Seriously, so worth it, and she really does a wonderful and professional job. I love the new look, and was looking for something new and refreshing, and I definitely got it. :-D

Taher and I have been extremely busy with projects. We have mainly been working on the girl's room, and as soon as we get a referral for Khalil, we'll start on his room as well.

We still have a lot to do, but we've made A LOT of progress.

Taher painted the walls a beautiful green color. (T and I love color, if you haven't noticed) We cleaned out the old office closet, and now it's a closet that has clothes in it. Exciting!!!

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE

AFTER

My Mom then came up this past weekend and brought the crib that she and my Dad bought us. She and I put it together all by ourselves, and it was surprisingly easy. I love the look of the crib, and now all we need is bedding.
There are still things we need to do to this room, but I'm really pleased with the progress so far.

March 1st, 2003

This was the day that Taher proposed to me.

It was a perfect day. It was mild Minneapolis day. . . about 35 degrees outside, with a lot of snow. Taher told me to get dressed because he had something special for us to do.

He brought me to the Falls in the city, which is a place I love. When I turned around, I saw a bench with beautiful flowers and champagne. Taher then asked me to be his wife.

It's hard to believe that was 7 years ago. Time goes by so quickly, and I am constantly being reminded to never take anything for granted in life. .. especially the relationships we have with people.

I love you Taher! Thank you for asking me the easiest question I've ever had to answer.