Waiting for my family to be complete, I have a lot of time to sit and think about what kind of parents I want T and I to be to our children, and what kind of children we hope to raise. I think we all know the answer to that question for ourselves, but then life gets busy, and sometimes we get off track. I know at times we'll get off track, but I hope at the end of the day, we raise our children in an aunthentic way. . . true to what we believe in.
***
Humble children, who take nothing for granted, including the roof over their heads.
Children who have passports from a young age, and who see the world and realize there is so much more out there than the tiny borders in which they live in.
Children who see the devastation in the world, and want to know what they can do to help.
Children who want to read over watching TV. Children who know the value of a good education.
Children who are constantly surrounded by diversity.
Children who do not feel entitled to anything.
Children who know and understand what healthy love is.
Children who aren't afraid to dream big, and to go after those dreams.
Children who speak more than one language, from a very young age.
And the list goes
On,
and On,
and On.
***
We all have such different ways to raise our children, and I'm fortunate that T and I agree on how we want to raise ours. It's fun to think about all these things. It helps me to prepare for when the day comes. And I'll always have this list to refer back to, so when life does get busy (and it WILL get busy) I can always get back on track.
More than anything, I just want our children to be true to who they are. I'm a big believer in nature vs. nurture, and at the end of the day, I just want them to be good people, full of love in their hearts.
12 comments:
I have discovered that children mirror what they see. I have also discovered that they are also predestined to be a certain way. I've always spent a great deal of time reading, and read to all my children. One child loves to read, two do not. All of my children have kind hearts that reach out to those in need. That is all they ever knew.
Your children are going to be awesome.
I'm so excited for you two because your babes are going to be SO lucky to have the two of you!
I love your list, Leah. I was sitting in church last weekend listening to folks talk about how they're processing the events in Haiti with their children, and they did it with such compassion, sensitivity and grace. I thought to myself, "I hope that I will be able to someday pass this level of compassion and respect for differences to my own children."
Some mistakes I tend to make in my parenting is remembering that every single child is their own person. very special in their own ways. I tend to say things like, " Look at so and so, they do their chores with out arguing!" I am wrong in how I handle that. I have to remember just because 2 of my children abide by the rules and never talk back, doesn't mean another one won't.
I just know you will find your own parenting skills just like all wonderful parents have. It's not just up to you, it is up to the one of a kind incredible soul you are given in a child to determine the proper way to parent.
You and T will make wonderful parents because I believe your hearts are completely open.
That's a great list! My husband and I have similar conversations - both about the children we want to raise and the parents we want to be. I hope that just doing this thinking/planning now helps us to accomplish our goals in that regard.
It is good to have a list ahead of time. I also think it is wonderful that your children will grow up with diversity in their own household, with the knowledge that love is not defined by blood alone.
I think about how to raise these monkeys all the time...tough stuff really. Or is it? Don't know but I'll find out soon enough.
I love your list! I have been thinking a lot about this kind of stuff recently. I think especially with the recent events in Haiti I wonder how I will explain something like that to a child or talk about Martin Luther King and the ugly truth of racism in our country. My biggest hope is that my child/children will feel comfortable talking to Damon and me about all this hard stuff. It is good you have the blog so you will be able to go back and read about this and how important it was to you. Although, one of my new adoptive mom friends recently told me that "she was the greatest parent before she became a parent." I thought that was a good way of putting it and a reminder to have mercy on yourself and that all parents make mistakes.
You will be a perfect parent, and everything you want for your children will be a reality because you will make it so. :)
Now where are the belly shots?
That is a lovely list that can be a guiding post and accountability as you embark into parenthood. I especially love the one that your kids will have passport. Traveling is the best education. I basically grew up outside of US in several different countries before the age of 13 and I would't trade it for anything. I am functionally bilingual, but my husband isn't. I'm hoping my mom can help teach our future kids her mother tongue.
I love your list. It is wonderful.
And I TOTALLY believe in Nurture over Nature.
I'm so sorry.
Post a Comment