Happy 4th of July Weekend - A Year Ago

Before I started this blog last August, I had another blog. When I started this one, I made my other one private, and hopefully someday I will do something with the posts of my other blog, but for now, it just sits there, in privacy, with my thoughts on many different things.

It is fun to go back and read my posts. What is more fun for me, is reading between the lines of my old posts. I see what I wrote, but in my head, I know what I was thinking and not saying. Because my old blog, I didn't talk about the battle I was going through. It was too raw still, and I was living it too fully. I had to get beyond my battle to put it all into perspective.

Here was my post from a year ago:

"The plan was to go spend a long weekend at a cabin with my sister, her fiance, and friends, but unfortunately, plans changed and T and I are spending the weekend at home. I do wish we were at a cabin, but I’m having such a nice weekend, being productive, and relaxing. Before I hopped on the computer and into blogland, I was reading a lovely book, with the windows open, as the clouds rolled in and the rain started. I love the smell and sound of the rain! Now the rain is disappearing, and the sun is coming back out. A truly lovely day."

So, that is what I wrote. A year ago. But here is what I didn't write. T and I were planning on going to a cabin with my sis and her fiance (her now husband) and were really looking forward to it. But, I had to cancel at the last minute. Why? Because I was in the middle of my last IVF treatment and unfortunately, one of my monitoring appointments ended up falling right on that weekend. It was a sad holiday. Going through IVF was always sad for me. It was always filled with so much hope, but at the same time, it was always filled with so many what-if's. And T and I had decided this would be our LAST IVF. EVER. So we knew that if it didn't work, that would be it. And well, if you've been following my story, you know that it didn't work. Not even close to working.

That was my life. . . a year ago. Life can change quickly, and take on new direction. This 4th of July weekend, I am so filled with happiness and joy and anticipation. I like where I am right now. I am blessed and grateful.

“It is not for him to pride himself who loveth his own country, but rather for him who loveth the whole world. The earth is but one country and mankind its citizens.”

- Baha'u'llah