This weekend will involve packing and preparing for T's trip to Ethiopia on Sunday. He is nervous (You'll hear more of his thoughts when I publish his guest post next week) and I'm sad that he will be experiencing this himself. I mean. . . the emotions of meeting our son for the first time, I can't articulate how special and important this is for our family. I can understand how nervous he is. More than anything though, he's excited.
T and I were driving home last night with Scarlett in the back seat, and he said that he hopes Khalil holds out his arms to him when he arrives at the orphanage to meet him. I told T those expectations are a bit high. Yes. . . we've been dreaming of this boy for over a year, but he doesn't know us, and that is something we must realize and accept. I take comfort in the fact that he will know us though. We will bond and he will know us as his parents. . . in time.
T is also very sad to be leaving Scarlett. He's a wonderful father and it's so obvious how in love he is with his little girl. I'm sad for him that he's leaving Scarlett, but I promised him I would talk about him constantly and we'd even call his cell phone just so we can hear his voice on his voicemail. I know how he feels though, as I ponder leaving Scarlett to go back for the second trip. In a perfect world, we'd never have to leave our children, but I know both Scarlett and Khalil will love us forever, even if we have to leave them both from time to time.
T is also sad that he'll have to leave Khalil. Our orphanage only let's the parents visit for less than 2 hours, and they suggest we don't visit him in the orphanage daily while in Ethiopia. They don't want Khalil to start bonding with us yet. . . afterall, T will have to leave him there after a few days. They really don't want the bonding to occur until the 2nd trip, when we can take him in our arms for good.
And then there is the separation between T and I. I'm less nervous about that one. We've been separated many times by continents before. Early on in our relationship, T went to Egypt for a month with his father. It was the LONGEST month of my life. Then I went to Norway a few years later to visit girlfriends and T stayed at home. I'll miss him like crazy, but it will be okay.
I have no doubt that he is going to have the experience of his life. Although T has been to Africa many times, he's never been to sub Sahara, so I know it will be a whole new experience. I'm glad that he's traveled so frequently however, because I think going to Ethiopia will be a less of a culture shock than it would be for some. . . although I still think there will be shock involved.
I love you T, and I wish you the safest of travels on this most important journey. And I assure you Scarlett and I will be well taken care of while you are away.
15 comments:
*Sniff!* This post is so beautiful- it brought tears to my eyes! You're already such great parents to your little ones!
Very exciting...best of luck getting everything prepared for his trip to ET.
As for the big hug, arms wide open, hopes...well, definitely don't have too high of an expectation.
With our experience, the kids in ET care centers were always more comfortable with women than with men. This is probably due to the fact that they're surrounded by women all the time, with very little interaction with men (nannies/nurses are usually always women - at least with our agency that was the case).
Our daughter did not have any issues with my husband though, and she actually went to him first upon meeting her, so you just never know!
Best of luck...so happy for you and your family!
Holy cow I can't believe this moment is already here! It seems like ages ago when you email me from your nom de plume blog. Maybe it WAS ages ago....
The most exciting part is that in a couple months, your family will be complete. I am so happy for you guys.
Safe travels Taher!
Aw! I am so excited when you are all 4 together at home! So much joy ahead :)
The family that was in our travel group who was there for their first trip (court) got to visit with their daughter quite a bit. They saw her at least three times. Is he staying at YGF? Basically, Dove won't be telling him what to do when he is there. Hanina the hospitality coordinator will help cooridnate his visits with her, and if he pushes a bit, I bet he will be able to see him almost every day.
He probably won't hold out his arms, but if he has a few fun toys to offer him, it is a great way to break the ice! Then when he brings those toys back the next day, K will be like "ooh, this is the fun guy!" Good luck T!
Have a safe trip T!!!!
just wanted to wish you and your husband lots of luck as his trip approaches. Hope everything goes really well.
Hugs and prayers! So much going on! I can only imagine. Thinking of you! Thanks so much for sharing your insight!
You are so amazing Leah! You're so strong....I can't imagine the roller coaster of emotions you're going through. (((HUGS)))
That was such a sweet post. Best of luck to you guys. I cannot wait to hear about the trip!
What an amazing experience this will be for T! Soooo excited!
Hugs and prayers as T leaves today! Safe journey for him and big hugs for you as you have to imagine all that's going on over there and take care of Scarlett by yourself. Thinking of you!
its just all so exciting. I am not sure that I agree with their 2 hour visit. I can understand some of what they are saying but on the other hand if he is somewhat used to T then it will be that much easier for him to leave with him as well. Those of us that had long Guatemalan adoptions will understand that one, most of us went on lots of visit trips normall for 5 days or so with your child and then had to go him, its was absolutley awful to leave but worth it as well, and I would think that it would help for then to al least have some recognition of T, if he just knows that he is someone fun to play with at the orphange, its not like he willthink anything past that as a little boy, I say visit away but do not force interaction or expect anything in return just know that your child will have a little bit more comfort when you come to get him on your pick up trip.
Thinking of you all this week. I haven't left you a comment in a while, and am feeling bad about that! Congratulations on your beautiful daughter; you are so blessed! I'm praying for you as you make a big decision, but trust that whatever decision you make will be the right one.
Blessings!
prayers for your family...
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